I looked at ICE job listings and found the Secret Police

What looks like a duck and quacks like the Gestapo?

“America needs you!” is what greets you at the Immigration and Customs Enforcement “join” page. What isn’t said is “if you’re an immigrant, America doesn’t need you,” but the message is still crystal clear. For the first time since the 1960s, the U.S. has a net loss of immigrants. A Pew Research Center report shows that the number of immigrants living in the U.S. declined by 2.3 percent since the start of President Donald Trump’s term; that’s 1.4 million less immigrants. Part of this is due to the Biden administration, in 2024, putting the brakes on asylum seekers; another part is that a record 11 million-plus immigrants arrived between 2020 and 2025, so it’s a natural ebb and flow.

But a larger part is represented by the 1.6 million immigrants who have “self-deported” and the 400,000 forcible deportations conducted by ICE, according to the Department of Homeland Security. The OBBBA showered $170 billion into ICE, which seems to be running just fine in the midst of a federal government shutdown that has, as of me typing this, gone on 19 days, 7 hours, 26 minutes, according to the White House shutdown clock. Nobody seems to be taking the shutdown seriously, at least not yet.

ICE is rolling along, and has maximized the scope for expedited removal. It’s now typical for ICE squads to raid a location, haul away anyone determined to be a noncitizen, including those who are not the target of the raid, quickly process them, and whisk them to a detention center, which for cities and states with non-cooperation “sanctuary” policies, is out of state and out of jurisdiction of local courts and judges. This typically happens within 24 hours, which is faster than most local officials and the detained person’s legal representation can act.

This has led to some really compelling footage of raids and detentions, especially when protesters gather and clash with authorities.

It seems that ICE is being beefed up into a genuine paramilitary organization, operational all over the United States, with authority to detain people on simple suspicion of being in the country illegally, raid workplaces on simple suspicion of employing illegal workers, or raid places merely suspected of harboring illegal aliens, including state and municipal courthouses. This, along with a major expansion of personnel, equipment, scope, and the quick implementation of policy changes, has led to a series of unfortunate situations where people have been caught up in the gears of ICE’s deportation machine who have followed all the procedures and attended hearings. Some of them have been arrested at their own hearings in order to obtain citizenship. Workers who have obtained Temporary Protected Status have had it yanked from them, turning their situation from stable to fugitive overnight.

I am not saying that all the policy changes are bad. The Obama administration’s “come hither!” policies did much to bring in millions of immigrants through our southern border and from Afghanistan, India, and China. The Biden administration reversed many of the immigration restrictions from Trump’s first term. And Biden’s political miscalculation of pretending the border was not a sore spot with Americans, and that unlimited sanctuary policies of many cities and states would not result in backlash, created an atmosphere of anger and suspicion. Cities like Boston, New York, and Chicago were teeming with hotels and shelters filled with immigrants, most of them here illegally, though some with TPS or pending applications for refuge as the system was clogged with paperwork and tremendous backlogs.

Trump’s crackdowns have discouraged that kind of influx, and has in fact reversed it. I am not certain how much the ICE raids have contributed to the border crackdowns, because reinforcing the border itself, in my mind, is enough to keep illegals from getting in, in large numbers. Then the problem becomes stopping smuggling and drugs from coming in, and guns from going out. That’s a different problem than raiding workplaces and private homes to root out individual immigrants or groups.

Going back to ICE’s job openings, the best way to deal with the backlog of immigration cases is to use the legal pathways that already exist. So you’d think DHS would be looking for lawyers. But there’s only two (count’em!) attorney positions listed on USAJobs after clicking the link labeled “For the closers. For the resolute. For those who represent the U.S.A” on the “join” page. One of them is a “General Attorney (General Administrative Law” paying $63,163 as a GS 11-15, in Washington, D.C. The average starting salary for a green entry-level lawyer in D.C. is $114,000 to $122,500 per year. Whoever takes the ICE job is, let’s assume for the sake of logic, not the best of the bunch.

There’s also a “Supervisory General Attorney (Labor and Employment Division)” paying $167,603 as a GS 15. That’s bit better, about what an entry-level corporate lawyer in D.C. would expect. But two lawyers, no matter who is in the position, or what you pay them, is not going to make a dent in the backlog. This would indicate the Trump plan, executed by border czar Tom Homan, is not to work through the backlog. The first category of jobs that ICE listed on its “join” page is Deportation Officer, and the heading there is “For the enforcers. For the brave. For those who fight to keep America safe.”

Clicking that links to a USAJobs page listing the requirements for the entry-level GL-5. To summarize: three (3) years of general experience, one of which is equivalent to a GS-4 in the federal government, or a bachelor’s degree, or a combination of those. No police experience necessary. They’ll train you. You need to have a clean criminal record, be under 40 years old at the time of application, and have a valid driver’s license. You’ll be required to pass a physical fitness test.

The ERO (Enforcement and Removal Operations) Basic Immigration Law Enforcement Training Program is 13 weeks, plus an additional 5 weeks of Spanish language training. If you pass, you get to be a deportation officer, carry a gun, and go out to “fight to keep America safe.” According to DHS, more than 150,000 applications have been received as of September 16 for the approximately 18,000 ERO jobs available. These posters adorn the DHS press release:

The DL-4 entry-level pay for a Deportation Officer is equivalent to to a GL-7 or GL-9 federal employee: $48,371 or $53,945 respectively. A GS-12 (for more experienced officers) can make up to $75,706. Then there’s locality pay for cost of living, overtime, and bonuses—the signing bonus is currently $50,000—along with student loan repayment and other potential benefits.

The Trump administration, funded by Congress, in the middle of a federal shutdown and mass firings in the federal workforce, is building a paramilitary law enforcement organization that has jurisdiction inside the borders of our country, works with the National Guard, DHS (which includes the Coast Guard), and other military branches, has the backing of the FBI and the Department of Justice, and consists of a whole bunch of people whose loyalty is with the president and the Secretary of Homeland Security, Kristi Noem. Whether you agree with the policies behind this or not, does this seem like a “not that there’s anything wrong with that” thing to do?

In September ICE agents, looking for a deportation target, asked to search a man’s home. The man was cooperative, telling the DOs he put his Rottweiler, Chop, in the bathroom for their safety and the dog’s safety. They shot Chop. The Facebook page for We Rate Dogs got political. And this is a site that never gets political: it’s about dogs.

This is Chop. He was shot and killed by masked assailants in plain clothes who go by ICE. They showed up at his door “looking for migrants after receiving a tip.” The son of the family asked if they could wait before entering the home while he put Chop away in the bathroom, as the dog can be aggressive with strangers. According to the family, it is at this point that the son went to his pickup truck to retrieve his ID and a Border Patrol agent entered the home, opened the bathroom door, and shot Chop. None of the agents helped the family, who desperately tried to render aid to Chop, as he bled to death on the kitchen floor. Unsurprisingly, the agent who shot their dog then hid from them and refused to give his name. Even more unsurprising, they did not find any evidence of the migrants they were there to terrorize in the first place.

The post added: “Do not open your door for these f*****g losers. Rest easy Chop,” and rated the dog “14/10” (all dogs are rated above 10).

Remember the backlash over Biden’s bad border policy? The backlash against ICE and Trump’s secret police is going to make “No More Kings” look like a Jesus People hippie rally. And that’s exactly the analogy I am using on purpose for hiring 18,000 ICE Deportation Agents with $50,000 signing bonsues, and only two poorly-paid lawyers. This is the same strategy Vladimir Putin uses to raise his Ukraine army, offer signing bonuses, and the promise of doing some damage.

At its height, the Secret Police of the Third Reich had 34,000 employees total. But they were greatly feared. The official name of that group was “Geheime Staatspolizei.” You and I know it by its abbreviation: Gestapo. I’m not saying that ICE is Gestapo, only that it looks like Gestapo, uses Gestapo tactics, and attracts the kind of people who may enjoy cosplaying Gestapo agents.

It’s not a good look to have American paramilitary police rounding up and handcuffing 300 South Korean workers in Bryan County, Georgia, a rural county that is home to a brand new Hyundai EV plant touted by Governor Brian Kemp and others as an economic boon to a poor area of the state. Their crime? They overstayed their ETSA visa extensions, or didn’t possess B-1 visas that allowed them to perform manual labor. They were South Koreans working for a South Korean company to build a plant that will employ thousands of Americans and they were treated like criminals by that group of ICE agents who swore to “defend the Homeland”. Just guessing here, but a few of those low-paid attorneys would probably have solved the visa issue faster, cheaper, and with less bad media than the crew of ICE agents who descended on the plant.

But that’s not Tom Homan’s strategy. That’s not President Donald Trump’s strategy. They want to flex power. They want to build a paramilitary force. I don’t know if I’d go so far as to say they want a Secret Police, but what they want sure looks like it, and acts like it. As they say, if it walks and quacks like a duck, it’s probably a duck.

ICE relies on reliable, real-time arrest data, that it obtains with or without the cooperation of local and state law enforcement, to pick up “targets” as they are released from booking on their own recognizance. This includes a 13-year-old in Everett, Massachusetts, who was picked up before his mother could get him, and whisked out of state. The agency first claimed the boy had a gun, but he was booked by local police because he had a knife and experienced behavioral problems at school.

“For my understanding, there are no convictions and they are just that, allegations,” said Andrew Lattarulo, the family’s immigration attorney. “If he is so dangerous, as DHS claims, then why was the Everett Police Department going to release the child to the mother? It’s not like he sat in front of a juvenile judge here in the States. Instead, what ICE did was take the child very fast out of the state by car.”

The boy’s family has work permits and is pursuing asylum. It may just be a matter of time before ICE comes for them, too.

These agents are told to round up everyone, and this is what they’re doing. My problem with that is that these people are enjoying it too much, which is good if you’re building a Secret Police force, and bad for everyone else. The backlash will come, it will be violent, and it will provoke Trump to use the Insurrection Act to deploy the military. Then we’ll have the trifecta of terror: ICE as the Secret Police, the National Guard as the Protection Squadron (translation of Schutzstaffel, which we know by the abbreviation S.S.), and the imperious executive as the word beginning with F meaning “leader.”

I’m not saying this is what the Trump administration is working toward. I’m just saying it looks a whole lot like that. And it’s more than just a look, if you ask me.

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